Everyone chilax...

Er'body take a chill-pill, I did...

I'm not an addict it's cool, I feel alive.

- That song by KC's Choice from the 90's came on the other day after I popped a Vicodin at work AFTER THE DENTIST. I just want to make that part clear.

I am not a drug addict ok??? BUT... A recent dental experience resulted in me being on Vicodin for two days at work, two awesome days. In this case narcotics have caused me to re-evaluate my attitude toward work and I have a new philosophy: Work like you're high!

(My manager is reading this right now, but guess what Kevin... not writing on company time, so pay attention! ;)

Here is what I learned from being on drugs:

It's all good! Don't stress out, you'll kill someone's buzz, probably your own.

Calm down, nothing you do in that 8 hours is going to matter to you in 10 years.

Laugh. Have a cookie or sixteen.

People who say "It is what it is" are douche bags who don't want to resolve the real issue, because of laziness or incontinence... or incompetence.. or all three!

With that said, I haven't blogged much this year, and I think it's because I've been stressed.
(That will change for at least the next week...) It's hard to come up with random funny rants about things when you are trying to analyze what is wrong with Pizza Hut's pepperoni implementation processes and writing letters suggesting they give customers a scope statement outlining of cheese / sauce / meat ratios and volumes to establish a standard expectation going into the pizza purchase agreement. People don't find that stuff funny (Pizza Hut on Coliseum sure didn't...)

I didnt think I was that stressed, but spend a day on narcotics and you realize, "Wow, I was kinda stressed".

I'm going to eat some cookies and milk for breakfast now.

Peace Out